Aye - if you had to close up the links I sent you, here they are again!

( HaloB extravaganza! (The gayest word ever worded.) )

And for Thad . . .

( Gorillaz recs and something else involving Eroica that will make you VERY HAPPY! )

Oh my god, I love P!nk. So does Kira. Who is not me.

( P!nk stuff )

Also, have some fic recs! I just went through all of 'em, and I'll be sharing one fandom or pairing with every post, so. Yeah. Enjoy! Also, if you find any exciting Bleach fics, please link me! Especially lesbians. Because they are good for the soul.

( Bleach (5 Orihime/Tatsuki, 1 Yoruichi/Kuukaku, 1 Renji/Ichigo, 2 Ichigo/Uryuu, 1 multi-pairing) )

You Are a Dash

Your life is fast paced and varied. You are realistic, down to earth, and very honest. You're often busy doing something interesting, and what you do changes quickly. You have many facets to your personality, and you connect them together well. You have a ton of interests. While some of them are a bit offbeat, they all tie together well. You friends rely on you to bring novelty and excitement to their lives. (And while you're the most interesting person they know, they can't help feeling like they don't know you well.) You excel in: Anything to do with money You get along best with: the Exclamation Point

I VOTEDED. It was exciting. Except that douchenozzle who wanted to give me an Obama button. A) How do you know I voted for Obama? B) Even if I did vote for Obama, what the hell am I gonna do with a button? I don't have room for shit like that. Just the other day I threw away an inflatable monkey, and I'm pretty sure that my mom's gonna dig that out of the trash make me keep that. Because I totally need an inflatable monkey.

Did y'all know that Mike Gravel is still running? Is he delusional? He's supposedly a Libertarian now. Whatever.

I can't find my iPod. Thad, Twitch, y'all didn't steal it, right? -_-; *freaking out a little*

In other news, I signed up for yuri_challenge to bring the joy of lesbos to the internets. I claimed the following prompts:

* Runaways - Karolina Dean/Xavin "She has never been with a girl before, and Xavin has never been a girl; but, somehow, it all falls into place."
(Because it's necessary.)

* Nextwave - Elsa Bloodstone/Monica Rambeau "Thank god we're hot chicks with super-powers."
(Because Jesus wants me to.)

I started writing the K/X last night at eleven o'fucking clock because stupid ideas kept entering my head and REFUSING TO LEAVE. I have no choice but to foist this on you all. Warning: this has not been read over since it was written and likely makes no sense and/or is overly sentimental BUT I DON'T CARE. Enjoy. Or not.

( I will not push her, though she squirms and mutters in her sleep and something in me shifts at her whispers of desire. )

In other news, anybody who liked this picture:

( NSFW 'cause nekkid. )

will like this as well:

Cats & Dogs. Angua/Sally, by sister_coyote at yuri_challenge, which Thad cannot read because HE HASN'T READ THUD! YET. >8U

Also, best Psych fic I've read to date is to be found here (pt. 1) and here (pt. 2). Seriously. Even if you do not like Psych or Shawn/Lassiter at ALL, you must read these. They are works of art. rispa_cooper, want my babies?

. . .

P.S. ANY OF YOU BASTARDS WHO HAVEN'T VOTED, GO OUT AND DO IT NOW, GODDAMNIT. *wrath!fist*

I will be an incredibly fulfilled and balanced person if I wake up 51% of the days of my life feeling happy, loved, rested, and ready to face whatever crap I have to do. That is seriously all I need.

Things that people don't praise enough:

* a light breeze on a hot day
* hearing a great song you haven't heard in a long time
* pointless arguments
* the word 'poop'

< / corny >

I AM D-O-N-E DONE WITH CBT.

AHAHAHA. FUCK YOU, OCD. IN THE ARSE. WITH A CORNCOB.

Last appointment was yesterday. Susanna's off to have a baby now. And I am free and wise in the ways of kicking OCD in the dick! Plus my mom bought me a hot dog and an apple turnover. *drools* I wants more.

( Excited, unrelated rantings )

Quick, somebody tell me something funny.

AUGH. REALITY SUXX.

Jesus God, you'd think a test study book would be able to spell somebody's name right.

David Wechsler is one of the most important figures in intelligence testing. He developed the WAIS (Wechsler Adult Intelligence Scale), the WISC (Wechsler Intelligence Scale for Children), and the WPPSI (Wechsler Preschool and Primary Scale of Intelligence). So obviously he shows up in my psych review book.

As David Weschler. Not just once, either. Eight times in two pages. What do you want to bet I'd get points taken off for that on the actual exam? Yeahhh.

Who wants to read some Mogi/Aizawa?

That's right. You all do.

Fever for the Flava, T, by Her Sweetness.

Oh, man. I lawled.

And some art by Elicadragon, featuring Mogi wearing lip gloss. Then Yagami Soichirou calls him into his office, and Mogi's like, "Yes, Ms. McLaughlin . . . ?"

Oh, LAWWWWWWWWL.

A choice selection from political_macro. I didn't make any of these.

( You tell 'em, Barack. )

HEY. HEY YOU GUYS. I ACTUALLY WROTE SOMETHING.

Thad: I am the worst person ever for taking this long, but HERE IS YOUR BIRTHDAY FIC! Only seven months late . . .

And, for those of you who haven't read it, my Good Omens Exchange fic.

YAY I AM SO ACCOMPLISHED.

Ugh.

Humanity continues to perplex the fuck outta me.

I have been going to the library at 9.15 every morning and reading outside until it opens at 10. It is very, very easy to find out the opening hours of the library: you can either go to the website, or you can call, or you can drive up to the library and look at the giant sign with opening hours on it. Yet every morning there is a steady stream of people who drive their cars up to the front door, climb out, walk confidently up to the sliding door, stand on the motion sensor pad thing, stare inside, become perplexed, peer around, and then notice - OH! - the giant goddamn sign saying the library is not going to open for another half-hour. What the hell? As far as I know, the opening hours have been the same for the last ten years. I mean, I'll admit that I was surprised when I looked up their hours on the website because I had been under the mistaken impression that they opened at 9, but the point is that I checked. Was that wrong? Do people not do that anymore? It's probably super uncool and I've ruined my extensive street cred.

Additionally, I just went to take a piss and wash my hands, and the woman in the sink next to me said, "Hi". Just "Hi". What the christ? I am washing nasty toilet germs off my hands! Don't talk to me, ho! Is this protocol? Is this normal? Have I been incredibly rude in the past? Actually, in retrospect, I don't care. Just don't talk to me while I'm washing my hands. It's important scientific work.

My last example of strange behaviour: I went to get a sandwich from Caribou. The sandwich is like five dollars and fifty goddamn cents. For that titchy sandwich! So I didn't buy it, 'cause I had two bucks. I told the guy at the counter, you know, "Uhh, never mind, can I have some lemon poppyseed cake?" He gave it to me, and then he went, "Want a cup of water with that?" "Uhh, no thanks." "Okay, I'll get you some." "No, thank you!" "Oh." He looked really disappointed about it. But then he gave me this creepy smile, to which I responded with a death rictus and ran across the street to catch my bus. Was this flirting, or was he a crazed psycho killer from whom I was lucky to get away with my life? NONE OF THIS MAKES SENSE.

I think people should just have neon signs above their heads that say what they're thinking. It would save SO. MUCH. TIME.

MOMMY, I WANT A TYRA.

God, her face is so hilarious.

DAMNIT, TWITCH.

***

PEE ESS.

I can't come this Friday, Thad. *teh sadness* I AM VERY SORRY. *sings the Very Sorry Song*

Here we go here we go here we go:

THIS is a fancy-fancy zine of gayness. Read it. It's pretty goddamn gay, amirite yo.

In other news, I AM GETTING A JOB AND AN APARTMENT AND A LIFE. IT'S SO FUCKIN' FAB.

That is all.

I JUST GOT THE HIGHEST SCORE POSSIBLE ON MY PRACTICE TEST.

I THINK I WILL GO HAVE SEX WITH EVERYONE IN THE UNIVERSE, LISTEN TO MY NEW R.E.M. CD, CURE SOME LEPERS, AND THEN EAT A POUND OF CHOCOLATE.

I HOPE THAT'S OKAY WITH EVERYONE.

*faints away*

That is all.

Credits: Twitch, myself, and one o'clock in the morning.

So apparently there are secret plots to spirit my grandmother away when something goes wrong, as the vast hordes of family apparently believe is inevitable. Just because I happen to agree with them doesn't mean they aren't assholes for talking about this behind my mother's back. My loyal hackles, they bristle.

It's kind of like . . . you know Nanny Ogg from the Discworld series, she of the huge family full of mild snits? It's kind of like that, only the mild snits are really well barbed.

Is that the melodious sound of the dog shitting on the carpet that I hear? Or rather . . . the melodious sound of her being shouted at.

Anyway, enough about that. LJ has pornularly failed me, so I am going to do a retarded meme that I wanted to do, like, two years ago before I had an mp3 player. Then I'm going to dick around searching for quizzes to do. Then I'm going to read The Turn Of The Screw until I pass out.

( MEME )

( Dumbass quizzes )

Well, we made it to the shore, for better or worse. I'm thinking worse, personally, because we already had several instances of dogshit on the carpet and very high-decibel arguments. Really, I do try to be a helpful person, but it's difficult when you have been driving on the highway for hours and hours and hours with a little boy in the backseat who can't stop listening to 'Girlfriend'. I mean, okay, once is fun. Twice is fun. Twenty times? Not so fun. Plus my mother CANNOT GIVE DIRECTIONS.

Did I mention that there's a real love in this family for Fox News? Seriously, can I just shoot myself right now?

It wouldn't be that bad if my mother wasn't flipping her shit constantly. I'm sure it'll get worse, too. But at least I have the dog . . . and the other dog . . . who shits on the carpet.

God, I miss my friends.

Fuck this. I look like a zombie. I'mma lurch to the beach with the dog. And frolic. FUCK Y'ALL, I'M GOING TO FUCKING FROLIC.

I will be online tonight. I expect somebody to be there to console me.


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In case anybody wanted to know.

All day and all night on March 21 (Friday, also known as TOMORROW), don't post on LJ! Stay away! Don't comment! EAT SANDWICHES. Because LJ is being a cuntwaffle. More info HERE.

In other news, I'm off to the beach tomorrow to get sand in my bits. I may post sporadically in order to complain about my retarculous family. I'm sure it will be greatly enjoyable to you all.

In other other news, GOOD OMENS KINK MEME THIS WAY. That is some hot shit right there.